11.26.2014 Thanksgiving blues

It's the day before Thanksgiving and I am trying my hardest not to think about it but I am failing miserably. Once again I have to work the holidays, and working last year, I know exactly what's in store and I am not looking forward to it. On Thanksgiving day I only saw two people on their way to dinner, and I didn't see a single soul for the rest of the day. I kept getting videos of everyone at the dinner table, eating, singing, just being a big happy family. I came home that night only to find there was no food left and nobody had bothered to save me a plate. The rest of the holidays weren't much different. I desperately don't want to be a Debbie downer but having to work Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New years again really sucks. This is my favorite season and I can't even enjoy it. I went to bed Thanksgiving night and cried. I know I feel childish but I don't want to go home and help prepare for a holiday I won't be able to participate. I don't want to go anywhere else either and watch everybody else prepare and tell me to have a happy thanksgiving because I know I won't, so here I am walking alone at the park trying not to think. And failing miserably.